Escaping The Stupid
by Shesaflame
Summary: Brittany can't take it anymore. Can't handle people insulting her, and just life takes over her, causing her to plot out her death.


**Trigger Warning- Suicide, drug overdose, mentions of cutting.**

* * *

I know that at one point, I said I didn't wanna die yet. But.. That was back when Sue tried to shoot me from a cannon. This is now, and I'm just so sad. I don't really know why I'm here anymore. And that's why I'm just going to change it. I googled the word 'dying' and I got a whole bunch of way that I could do that, and the more I think about it, the better it sounds. I don't really like pain, so the idea of poking at my skin with sharp things, or shooting myself, doesn't sound very good. I wanna die still looking like a person. I hate blood. I remember one time Santana fell, and she started bleeding on her knee, and it made me scared. So that's why I have to pick a different way.

I figure I'll just swallow a whole bunch of pills. I mean, that seems easy. I just hope that I don't end up having to pee after, because that's going to be a lot of pills, and I have to drink water when I swallow them. I don't want to die with a full bladder. It would just be very, very uncomfortable to have to constantly feel like that when I'm dead.

Every day it's the same thing. 'You're stupid, Brittany.' I'm tired of being called stupid every day. It makes me feel really bad, because I don't want to think I'm stupid, but these people just keep saying it. I got into MIT, I must be smart. But they all think I'm lying. They think I'm an idiot. Santana used to tell me I'm not. But ever since we broke up, she doesn't let me know anymore. Being with Sam kinda makes my heart hurt. He's great, and we're both blonde, but he doesn't get me the way Santana does, and he and I can't have awesome lady sex since he isn't a lady. Santana was the best thing to happen to me, and it doesn't seem like I even have her now.

Leaving is what's best for me.

I'm gonna go look for those pills now. Hm.. where did my mom put them... Wait, there they are. I feel like being here in the bathroom is a dumb idea. I wanna be in my bed. Maybe they'll think it happened in my sleep if I'm there. Even though it's like, 3 in the afternoon. I take naps sometimes, so maybe that's what they'll think.

There's a whole bunch of pills on my bed now. I tried to count them, but I lost my place after the first 10. Or was it 12? Either way, I have them all sitting right here. I'm not sure how medicine will make me not live, because it's supposed to make you better. Maybe they'll do something like fix my brain or something. Maybe they'll make me smart!

Well, here goes nothing.

One.

Two.

Three.

* * *

There's no more pills on my bed. They all went into my body. I don't feel any different yet. I guess I'll just have to wait. Maybe in half an hour it'll start to work. I hope so. I want it to happen faster.

Five minutes.

Ten minutes.

Twenty minutes.

Thirty minutes.

* * *

I think it's working. My eyes keep closing, and I can't feel my legs. I'm gonna roll over to make it seem like I fell asleep normally. I hope nobody gets sad. So now, I think I need to close my eyes. They're droopy and heavy, and I need to sleep now. I'm going to be the smartest angel there is, and maybe Tubbs can join me soon, since I don't think the other cats in his gang like him very much. And they stopped giving him E.

I'm ready now.

Three.

Two.

One.

* * *

Her parents found her that night after the drugs had taken over her system, killing her organs, and her. One week later, a funeral was held, and everyone attended. Shortly after, Sam convinced his family to move to Tennessee, to get far away from the place where his girlfriend had killed herself. And two days after the funeral, Santana was found with slashed wrists, and no life left, so she could join her soulmate up above.

Brittany watches over the people on Earth. She wonders every day if they really miss her, or if they just act sad because they know she's watching. But she's happier now. She doesn't feel stupid as an angel, especially with Santana there to make her feel smart.


End file.
